The cheating: last night, my daughter mentioned as how she'd really like some of that cheese bread that Panera sells, and wouldn't it be a great idea if we rocketed up there to get some? No, I said, slowly, but I can make some focaccia tomorrow; you told me you like that as much. Which she did, and agreed to. This morning, I noticed, in the back of the pantry, a box of foccacia mix that I had gotten months ago, just to try out. Hmmm....mix, let rise, bake. Vs, get out the flour, the baking sheet, the herbs, the cheese.... Okay, we'll compromise and put a bunch of Parmesan on this just before it goes into the oven. Question is, will it still be around when she comes home from school?
The waiting: I've mentioned that there is a person with whom I'd like to be friends, but concluded some time ago that to her, I'm of no use, so not worth the time; the only time she responds to email is to mention how she's off to Paris again, or speaking at a conference in Italy, or....yeah, fine. So two days ago I got a response from her to a question. I know that somewhere in that response will be the kind of content I expect, so I'm letting the response just ....sit. I'm weaning myself off thinking of this person as a friend, at all. Which I don't really want to do, but, you know? Get disappointed one hundred and forty three or so times, you begin to wonder if its a trend.
And thats it!
6 comments:
Why do you want her as a friend? What will be the evidence of this friendship? (Thanks again for the tech input and I have not gone to those links yet.)
Because she's smart, and I like smart people. Partially, because I hope that knowing smart people will make me smart; partially, because I know so few of them that I'll take what I can get.
Only, as I say, even I have my limits...
I hate it when that happens. It's hard to count your losses when you want things to work out.
Well, I knew, intellectually, that I was being silly. Stupid, even. My wife asked more than once why I kept in touch with someone who so often irritated me. I gave the answer I gave here, but I knew it wasn't a good one. I just wanted to know someone who was accomplished, and smart. That sounds pathetic, I know.
What's ironic is that I read the response, this evening, and it was entirely straightforward, with not a mention of glamorous trips or any of that. It simply answered my question. I was quite surprised. Don't think that for just a second, I didn't get my hopes up. But only for a second.
I just like smart people.
Forgive me for saying so: she doesn't sound that smart. More like she wants someone to show off to.
I've known too many of them to be impressed by them. Sometimes it's just easier saying "well, if they don't want to be friends: it's their loss". I've done it a few times, and I feel all the better for it. :-)
Carolyn Ann
A degree each from MIT and Harvard Med says she's smart, as does the quintessential American standard: she's wealthy. I don't think she's trying to show off to me, for the simple reason that there's nothing I can give her that she needs.
I think it's her loss, too (mine, also), but I also think that its like cross-species breeding: it's possible, but you've really got to want it to happen. Whats funny is that for about six months after we met, she did -- and then it dropped off a cliff. Felt just like getting dumped in high school. Not that I ever was, of course; you have to date for that!
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