The master list is here.
-"Hello, this is Ron. (pause) Hello? Hello!!? Nah, just kidding. This is an answering machine. (etc.)"
- "You have reached the Strategic Air Command. We are unable to come to the phone right now. At the tone, please leave your target or list of targets and we'll launch as soon as we can. And have a nice day."
- [imitating Mr. Rogers] "Hello. I'm in the Magic Kingdom right now, so I can't come to the phone. Can you leave your name and number when you hear the sound of the tone? Sure...I knew you could."
-WOMAN : (seductively) Hi. I'm Linda. You know, it can be really lonely when you're a fashion model. Sometimes I just have to ... MAN: (interupting) Oh cmon, Linda, give me the damn phone...
-"Ello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Leave your message, and prepare to die."
- (uses pompous voice) "It appears that the houseboy has again failed to answer the phone so you'll just have to leave a message.
3 comments:
Some of these are hilarious!
I always hated when I'd get caught in an answering machine joke, but now I have it pinned to which of our friends will do it on occasion. Only funny when it happens to anyone but me. :P
He heee.
I think that answering machine messsages should be short and sweet. At home, ours says the last four digits of the number, and then 'please leave a message'. That's it. Anything else would grow onerous after just a few iterations.
Ello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You have assaulted my ears with your irritating phone message for the last time. Prepare to die. Your telephone number is being sent to ten thousand telemarkers.
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