Sometimes, I look at old women and wonder what they looked like when they were little girls. I wonder if they ever imagined that they would be old at all. I look at their faces and try to see the laughter that I hope was part of their youth, the kind of laughter that most people stop having about the time their lives start to transition into being adult. Its the kind of unaffected giggles that tell you, without looking, that its a kid laughing. I wonder if they ever think back to their youth, if they remember what it was like.
Today I found out that the daughter of a friend had died. The friend is more somebody that I used to work with, and so knew slightly. His daughter died while trying to come clean from an addition to heroin.
I just don't think of things like that happening to people I know. And I just don't think of things like that happening to once-happy little girls.
5 comments:
That's such a waste of a once bright and hopefull life.
I'm always saddened by the loss to drugs and alcohol. My older sister was lost to cocaine abuse and she had a 6 week old baby. She was only 38 It's too much to take isn't it.
It really is so sad when a life is taken too soon for any reason. It's hard to put a finger on when childhood ceases to be carefree because if you think back, that time is full of angst and anxiety - just those worrying things don't seem as huge to us now. I think we are all shocked when something so awful happens to people we know.
For the longest time -- and even now, I am sorry to say -- I would assume that of course anyone who died through a drug overdose or something related to that must have been at fault -- a loser, dregs of the earth. Being even this close to it -- and hearing what you have to say-- helps me realize that that thats not always true. Perhaps not even usually true.
Put in a different content, I always thought that homeless people were inherently at fault, somehow. It wasn't until I began to realize how thin the line was for some of them between survival and dipping beneath the waves that I began to realize that it wasn't always their fault.
I'm not proud of having had these preconceptions, but I am glad to have begun to see past them.
That's so sad! Especially if she was trying to straighten out her life. I have to admit to having those same thoughts on drug addicts. I figure if they continue to take the next hit of whatever drug, it's their own fault. Whether it be coffee, beer, pot or some of the heavier drugs like cocaine. THEY make the choice to put it into their body, so THEY'RE at fault.
Homelessness can be different. In most cases they do not choose to be homeless but through horrible circumstances have either lost their job and home and are forced to find refuge in the streets. But then once I saw a documentary on a homeless middle aged man and he said he chooses to live there. Very confusing, I say.
I haven't had anyone close to me die of a drug overdose or the like, so my views may change if I knew someone personally .. but for now I'm stuck with what I've already expressed.
This is not a problem that admits of a single solution, or even a single explanation. My own attitudes have evolved over the years, but their basis is and always will be the ethic inculcated in me by the Roman Catholic schools I attended when I was young. I'm not unique in that, I'm sure.
I wish I had an answer for you instead of wimpy responses.
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