My wife and I went to see my mother today -- me in the early afternoon, and my wife in the early evening.
The good news is that she's improving, slowly. My wife's guess was that she could understand about three fourths of the things my mother said, so long as she spoke slowly. Still very fuzzy, of course, but decipherable. And she had her menu upgraded just a hair, so that she can eat things that are pureed. Surprisingly (to me), she can't eat things that are pure liquid -- ie, no water, no juice. It's all got to be something thats either naturally thick or thickened. But still, its a little better than last night.
The bad news is that she's pretty frail. She wasn't all that strong to begin with; now, apparently, the stroke has somewhat weakened her right arm and leg, so the hospital's concerned that she could easily fall. She's not supposed to get out of bed without assistance. That's a clear indication to us that she'll be going to a rehab hospital for speech and physical therapy, rather than having it at home. I'm sorry about that. I'd be sorrier if she came home and fell.
Tomorrow, we're going to talk to whatever doctor is on her case, so we can firm these things up. She had an MRI today, and all we know of the results is that they found something, but that it's consistent with what we already know. That sounds scary, but I imagine that its something that therapy will address. At least, I hope so.
My wife observed that it isn't fair, in a way -- these events occur, and you have to deal with them, but in the meantime, you still have to pay bills, go to the dentist, and get calls from telemarketers. You don't get a free pass to just deal with events. Ir'a also not fair to get toward the end of your life and have this kind of thing happen to you. No free pass there, either.
4 comments:
It is always hard to deal with events like this. For me it reminded me that as much as we take time to be selfish during these times (an understandable selfishness) the world still does not revolve around us in the end and time marches on. Although I do remember a feeling of time slowing down for awhile, but that fades too.
My Grandmother was sick for a long time before she passed away and I wonder what it was like to be in her position. Getting ill, recovering a bit, getting sick again, just hanging on.
Ok, enough of my depressing blabbering, all I really wanted to say was I am glad your mother is getting better and I hope you and your family doing good.
I actually woke up this morning thinking along those same lines.
Two weeks ago, my mother was able to go to the store. She needed a companion in the store, and couldn't carry the groceries, but that was it. Now, she's in a bed and can't even get out of it without assistance, let alone move around. Finding yourself looking at someone who was a functioning adult, and now effectively isn't, is a sobering experience.
Additionally, there's the institutional nature of hospitals, which tend to sideline you until they're ready to let you do something -- when I was in one overnight, having my shoulder repaired, I was ready and able to split at ten in the morning, and I didn't get out of there till six that night. I think that feeds the feeling of helplessness; if you didn't feel helpless before, you certainly will now, and if you did, now you REALLY do. You give up just about all of your adult abilities, checking into a hospital -- its like being a little kid again, subject to the whims of others.
I'm glad to hear your Mother's condition is improving. I hope only for the best for her.
Thanks, Rach. I just got back from the hospital. She was sound asleep, and given the difficulty she's had in sleeping, I didn't see the need to wake her. But I did get to listen to the family of the woman in the other bed. They were using phrases like 'the doctors don't think they can do much but make her comfortable'. I'm glad my mother couldn't hear that.
Tomorrow, she moves to a rehab hospital for therapy. I have no idea how long she'll be there, but my guess is, three to four weeks. If she can regain her strength, and the ability to eat (even if its just pureed stuff), she'll be in pretty good shape. If she can't -- well, we're hoping not to go there.
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