Bump the Rich

I understand that some airlines are now instituting separate security lines for their premium customers. The lines, you see, are administered by the airlines, right up to the point where the scanner is working. The airlines have been looking for a way to compensate their premium users, especially as service has declined, and this is what they've come up with.

It says "Pay more, get through the line faster". The logic is that it doesn't slow down the other line -- quite the contrary -- and the premium users are happier.

I think it's wrong. Security lines are a hideous necessity of our time, and going through them -- trudging through them -- builds a sense of solidarity. Its not much of a burden. But apparently, too much of one for some. So here's my idea. First class people generally board first, right? Noghing inherently evil in that, but you get to pass them as you trudge to the back of the plane, where the smaller seats are. Okay. As you do that --

Bump the rich.

As you pass, let your possessions casually nick the edge of their personal wide-seated airspace. Allow the occasional light item -- wouldn't want any long lasting contusions -- to caress them. Let that magazine, grabbed hasily from the stack, fall into their lap, possibiliy disarranging that report, the Wall Street Journal, or their fresh latte.

Nothing major. Just a little nudge.

Bump the rich.