I talk with several people in France as part of my French practice. Four of them are verbal (over skype), two are text (also over skype, or email). They're all good people - interesting, willing to accept my brand of French. I have a theory that people who are trying to learn another language, and use a tool like Conversation Exchange, self-select: these tend to be interesting people. ( Except me, of course!)
I like the people that I talk with. We're not close, but we get along well. If several weeks goes by
without talking to them, it's the opportunity to practice that I miss,
not so much actually being in touch with them. I'd like to talk to them
more often (greedily: if I don't speak French often, my confidence goes
down. Stupid, I know.), but if I don't, it's okay.
And it doesn't always work out. I've had partners who flamed out immediately - I get this
I don't want to talk to this person again vibe - while others just seemed to drift away. Part of that is because they're actual working people, while I'm not; consequently, I have a lot of time to talk. They have to juggle life. I remember what that's like; sometimes, like today, when a plumber is coming out to the house on the same day that I've got a session with my mento, I still do. In any case, I'm a little sad when that happens, but I've grown to expect it.
There's two people that I do feel close to, though. One's a retired woman who lives with her companion in Toulouse, and another is a man who lives with his family in Aix-en-Provence. I'm actually going to visit them, this summer, for a couple of days each. And a third: a woman who I text with fairly often, a pre-law student in Paris. When we visit Paris, I'm finally going to meet her, too. (I'm really looking forward to that. I warned her that although I know it's not French, and I know that she really prefers a sort of hands-off approach to life, I'm probably going to hug her when I see her.) I know more about these people, and their lives, which makes them a bit more 'real' to me.
And now, perhaps, one more. Two nights ago, I spoke for the first time with a woman who lives somewhat south of Paris. Normally, conversations are semi-rigid - we speak in French (mostly) for about half an hour, and then English (mostly) for a half hour. Right around the hour mark, one of us makes a comment about
the next time, and we look at calendars, and then we're done.
This new person, we spoke for
three hours, the first time. Granted, it was exceptionally easy for me, because about 90% was in English, and her English is very good. Still, three hours! And then the next day, yesterday, we spoke again, for two hours -- and afterwards she sent me a note to say that, in fact, she hadn't
wanted to stop; I had misunderstood a phrase she used (this conversation was about 90% in French), so she was perplexed when I ended the conversation. Five hours in two days with a new person! And we
meshed. We like the same kind of music. We disagree with the same prevalent thoughts about how best to learn a foreign language (and it still startles me, sometimes. to think of English as a 'foreign language'). We got along so well that immediately after, I sent her two links to music that we'd been talking about, and she sent me a link to music that reminds her of someone special to her who'd died, a few years ago.
I try hard not to notice, by the way, that she's very pretty, too.
Smart, pretty, interesting, willing to speak French with me -- at least for a while, I think I have a new best friend.
