It would take a lot to make me feel sorry for a pedophile, but this article from the New Yorker comes close. It's centered around a man who was convicted of owning child pornography, and who did attempt to meet a young girl. He didn't suggest sexual contact -- but he's legally held in jail past the end of his term because some people think that, given the opportunity, he might. No proof, just suspicion. That seems wrong to me. We let murderers out of jail, but not people like this?
And then I think And if he had contacted YOUR daughtet? Or the kids of our friends, our neighbors?
3 comments:
I have met pedophiles, (I was the bailiff at their court marshals) and neither of them are "monsters". They underwent an anquish about their self image which as heart breaking to watch. They have a compulsion, like biting one's nails, and judging by the "teen" categories in the porn sites readily available, it is not as uncommon as all that. And it is incurable.
The hardest part is to convince THEM that death is not the only way out, because quite seriously, in the two that I met, they firmly believed that it was. They were under suicide watch the whole time I was involved (and you bet a court marshal took its sweet time!)
Personally, though I liked them personally well enough, I would have left a bowstring in their cell. It would have been a mercy.
So you think that suicide is not the only way out, but perhaps it's the best?
I've never knowingly met a pedophile. Our neighbor is technically one, because he had sex with a 15 year old, but that's not what I think of when that word comes to mind.
I suppose its a weird analogy, but pedophilia is like gun ownership. Its okay, its not hurting anyone,... until it does. And then we spasm about all the things that we should have been doing to watch out. But for those affected, its too late.
Yes.
It should be an option. (actually, it should ALWAYS be an option. And yes...I know of what I speak...I have experience there too.) The pedophiles I met were devestated by their urges. If they could be anything else, or do anything else, they would have done it. Including suicide if they thought it could have made anything better. I advised those guys to wait a month until the emotions settled. As far as I know they are still alive.
I doubt very strongly that all pedos are like that. Or even most. I can only speak from what I know. The ones I knew were not monsters. Just obsessed. If only they could have got obsessed with stamp collecting or model trains, things might have been different. However, their obsession made them into self confessed monsters. Like a horder's obsession to bring home broken bicycles, there is really no cure.
That being said...
I believe that there are two kinds of people...predators and those they prey upon. Like a lion finds its way to the watering hole, the sexual predator positions him or herself near the watering hole. This is why people like Lisa Biron (http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/World/2013/01/11/20489896.html) end up in positions of authority. She was a gay advocate lawyer and styled herself as something very closely resembling a pastor.
Ah well...we could helicopter our kids, (USA) or we can teach them to rip the genitals off of people that hurt them (Sparta). Perhaps something in the middle.
Anyway, I could go on and on, however, you should check out that link.
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